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Marriage:TheProjectofCultureorFaith?
11
Weshoulduprootprejudicesstemmingfromtraditions,religions,hith-
ertoculture,basedonstereotypicalrolesofwomenandmen.Suchabasic
stereotypicalroleforawomanishermotherhood,foraman,fatherhood.
ThestruggleoftheEuropeanCouncilperfectlyfitshereforthestruggle
ideaofanotherEuropean,FredericEngels.TheadvocateofMarxistclassi-
cismsaidin1884:“Thefirstclassoppositionthatappearsinhistorycoin-
cideswiththedevelopmentoftheantagonismbetweenmanandwoman
inmonogamousmarriage,andthefirstclassoppressioncoincideswith
thatofthefemalesexbythemale.”8
Asaconsequence,“gender,”anewclassstruggleofasort,challenges
maternity
.Afterall,theessenceoftheoppressionofwomenliesinmater-
nityandraisingchildren,asNancyChodorowwroteinherbookentitled
TheReproductionofMothering.9
Onecanremark,usingcommonsense,andthusinamodernistway
,
thatsuchthinkingsoundslikesomethingabsurdandabnormal.The
pointis,though,thatwearelivingintimesinwhichthereisanongoing
destructionofterms,suchas“normality,”“abnormality”or“pathology.”
Thenewdesignof“normality”createsmanynewopportunitiesofdefin-
ingthefamily
.Theyaredominatedbyanopenapproachandinsteadof
aninstitutionaldefinitionofthefamily
,aprivate,voluntarysocialgroup
boundwithspecialties,isdefinedas“normal.”Thisstateofafairsdoes
notexclusivelybelongtoanideaorideology
,butittranslatesintolegal
andpoliticalstructures,theresultofwhichistheCharterofFundamental
RightsoftheEuropeanUnionissuedintheyear2000.Thedestabilization
ofthetermisaccompaniedbyalternativeformsofmarriageorfamily
life.Anditisnotjusthomosexualrelationsreceivingsomuchpublicity
andaspiringtoafictitiousrighttotheprivilegeofbeingdefinedasmar-
riage;whatismeanthereissanctioningdivorcesasnormal,sanction-
ing“successivepolygamy,”voluntarychildlessness(“childfreeness”)of
heterosexualcouples(DINK—“doubleincome,nokidsyet”),of“mono
parenting,”“freerelationships,”“trialmarriages,”ortheso-calledLAT—
“livingaparttogether”(partnershipinwhichtheindividualsregardeach
otheraslifepartnersbutliveapart).
Suchaculturally-expressedmarriagesignifiestodayarandomrela-
tionshipofselfishindividualswhosegoalsaretosatisfytheirowndesires.
Suchisthedetached-from-naturepictureoftheculturalmarriage,which
infactisnotandcannotbeafoundationforstartingafamily
.
8
F.ENgels:TheOriginoftheFamily,PrivatePropertyandtheState.II,4:The
MonogamousFamily.http://www.marxists.org/archive/marx/works/1884/origin-family/
ch02d.htm.
9N.J.CHODOROw:TheReproductionofMothering:PsychoanalysisandtheSociology
ofGender.Berkeley1978.